August 2006

“Learning too soon our limitations, we never learn our powers.” ~ Mignon Mclaughlin

Here’s something pretty cool:

“If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say?  And why are you waiting?”  ~Stephen Levine

What a totally amazing quote —- well, more than a quote really.  It’s more of a wake-up call, isn’t it?

For those of us who have had more than our share of losses in life, these words take on a whole new meaning.  I lost both of my parents at ages that were far too young to die, my sister-in-law survived cancer only to lose her life in a freakish accident, and my adorable in-laws have both moved on, as well.  There’s something about going through so many losses that makes you really appreciate, value, and maybe even cling to the people in your life, as well as your life, itself.

You know how people are always, always, always saying,  “You never know what tomorrow will bring?…”   I’ve become one of those people and there’s a reason we keep saying it - because it’s one of hardest, most “in your face” truths there is.  

Re-read the quote and make a few calls. Or, walk through the house and give out hugs!

Joi

You’d think that a reasonable, sane Ophidiophobic (one with a phobia of snakes) would stay as far away from “Snakes on a Plane” as possible, wouldn’t you?

Guess that means I’m not terribly reasonable, and sane might even be up in the air. As I’ve said before, I’m absolutely wild about movies - I love everything about them.  So when a new movie comes out causing a stir - I’ve got to see it asap.  Just my luck one of the biggest stirs was caused by a plane full of beings that make my hands clammy and my knees weak.  Trust me on this one - I’m terrified of these things. 

But the movie fanatic won out over the phobic and my husband, two of our daughters, and I set off to see the movie everyone’s talking about.  I kind of surprised myself - I only had to look away twice (well it wasn’t looking away as much as it was holding the huge bucket of popcorn in front of my face) and I only screamed out once.  Fortunately, there was a boy around 17 in front of me that screamed along with me.  Maybe louder.

The movie was awesome - I absolutely loved it.  Non stop excitement and adventure and lots of unexpected laughs - thanks to an amazing cast.  See the cutie patootie at the top of the post?  His name’s Kenan Thompson and he’s the ultimate scene stealer, in fact he’s the biggest scene stealer I’ve seen since…well…okay, he just may be the biggest scene stealer I’ve ever seen.  And I’ve seen more movies than you can even imagine.  He’s pure genius and I’m vowing to see everything he’s ever been in or ever will be in.

Samuel Jackson was his brilliant, flawless self.  He makes it all seem so effortless - you never catch him acting and that’s what makes him brilliant.

The movie does an amazing job of making it all look very realistic - unlike, say, King Kong.  It’s visually incredible.  

My daughters and I loved it, but my husband wasn’t quite as enamoured. I practically dragged him to see it. I think the difference is we females watch tons of movies like this. (The Hills Have Eyes, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Silence of the Lambs, etc.) So, very very little shocks us - even though a few bathroom scenes made us recoil, so to speak. If you’ve seen the movie, you probably know the scenes I’m talking about.  If you haven’t seen it yet, you’ll know….oh, you’ll know. 

My phobia came through it better than I thought - but I didn’t get much sleep that night. I finally just got up and sat in the living room - with the lamps on and my guard cat on duty. The thing is, we have a ceiling vent above our bed and I have an active imagination….and, so, well, you know.  My mind told me that I’d have a visitor before the night was through.

But, part of the fun of this type of movie is the spooks it gives you.  Isn’t it funny how some “stay with you” and others don’t.  Take The Hills Have Eyes, for example - scary as helllllll while you’re watching it. My girls and I rented it and got a work out while watching it.  We screamed, we jumped…I pounded my chair and nearly ate a pillow…Stephany grabbed Brittany, Emily made us hit pause while she walked around for a minute…. Halfway through, I looked on the floor and our cat was watching us with the funniest expression.  The thought bubble above her little head read “Total Morons.”

Be that as it may, it’s big fat FUN - and that’s exactly what SoaP is.  Even if it cost me a night’s sleep and has me high stepping around the yard.

Joi

“You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.” ~ Robin Williams

“Where did we ever get the crazy idea that in order to make children do better, first we have to make them feel worse? Think of the last time you felt humiliated or treated unfairly. Did you feel like cooperating or doing better?”  ~Jane Nelson

Have you ever seen a parent rip into their child with the worst of all weapons - words?  In one breath, they’ll tell them how much they love them, then in the next they’ll tear them down so many notches it’s a wonder they can even stand.

How do they explain themselves?  Well, they’re “parenting,” of course.  Providing the “discipline the young person needs.”  If you’re lucky, they’ll even launch into “…it’s how I was raised, and look at me!” scenario.  Love that one.

Most parents seem ignorant of the fact that life is a cycle.  The way you treat your child will have a large influence on how that child will turn around and treat you one day. 

Young people (and some not so young people) need discipline and guidance.  And a good parent will provide constructive discipline and guidance as opposed to destructive discipline and guidance.  How can you tell the difference between the two?

Constructive discipline and guidance Teaches.  Destructive discipline and guidance Taunts.

Constructive discipline and guidance Instructs. Destructive discipline and guidance Insults.

Constructive discipline and guidance Guides. Destructive discipline and guidance Goads.

Constructive discipline and guidance Builds up. Destructive discipline and guidance Tears down.

Constructive discipline and guidance Discourages. Destructive discipline and guidance Encourages.

Constructive discipline and guidance Persuades. Destructive discipline and guidance Dissuades.

Constructive discipline and guidance Cheers. Destructive discipline and guidance Jeers.

Parenting is the hardest job in the world - if there is anything harder, I want no part of it.  Even when you’ve done your level best, the child will sometimes disappoint you - and, that (of course) goes both ways. Both sides of the relationship have to respect, listen, and open up to the other side.  Unfortunately, too many people are only interested in one voice - their own.  And, sure enough, it’s the only voice they ever really hear. I guess that’s why they never learn anything or grow - nothing new ever penetrates….the old stuff just keeps running around bouncing off the walls of their mind. 

Ultimately, the main difference between constructive parenting and destructive parenting can be seen in the relationship between parent and child.  Especially down the road.

Joi

Battling high cholesterol?  Your best line of defense, as well as offense, lines up in the kitchen.

“If you eat a predominantly plant-based diet—with lots of fruits and vegetables plus some fish—you are on the right track to keeping your cholesterol at a healthy level,” says Lisa Dorfman, spokeswoman for the American Dietetic Association.

Certain Super Foods can actually help lower the bad cholesterol and/or increase the good cholesterol. What you’re aiming for is total cholesterol under 200, with LDL (the bad one) under 110 and HDL (the good one) greater than 35.

The Dos, The Don’ts, and The Don’t Even Think About its:

1. Eat more almonds.  Either snack on them throughout the day or throw them into:  Oatmeal, cereal, yogurt, mixed fruit, green beans, tossed salads, chicken salads, and pasta salads.  Just 1/4 cup of almonds a day can lower your LDL by 4.4 percent.
2. Eat more oatmeal.  You read it all the time, and there’s a reason for it - oatmeal reduces cholesterol dramatically. If you don’t eat oatmeal often because you think it takes too long to make, get this:  The instant variety is just as good for you.  You know, the little packets you tear open and add boiling water to? They come in a lot of really delicious flavors - peach, maple and brown sugar, honey nut, strawberry, regular, apple and cinnamon, etc.  Throw a little almonds on top and you’re set.
3. Eat fish regularly - as often as possible.  Omega 3 fatty acids are thought to be the best of the “good” fat. The best place to find them is in fish—especially fatty fishes like salmon, halibut and tuna. You can also get these fatty acids from walnuts and flaxseed (two tablespoons of flaxseed provides 3.5 grams) and in fish oil supplements.
4. Have more red grape juice and dark cocoa.  The flavanoids in each have anti-inflammatory properties that may help lower cholesterol and stave off heart disease.
5. Eat more soybeans, soy nuts, edamame, and products made from soy (tofu, soy milk).  Doing so helps to reduce the production of new cholesterol.  Aim for only about 25 grams of soy protein a day.  (If you have an increased risk for breast or prostate cancer, you might want to skip the soy.  Ask your doctor, and read up on it for yourself, but I’ve read that people in these risk groups should avoid too much soy.)
6. Get away from whole milk dairy products.  Ice cream and cheese are home to saturated fat, which clogs arteries and increases LDL levels.  Saturated fat is the No. 1 cholesterol-boosting culprit.  Switch to frozen yogurt, and throw some almonds on top.  (I know, I’ve got to get past the almonds.)
7. Processed meats are also no-nos.   Bacon and sausage are also very guilty of housing artery-clogging saturated fat. Try lower-fat options, like bacon and sausage made from turkey and other lean protein sources. With enough co-stars, like fresh tomatoes, lettuce, red onion - you can pull it off and make it work. 
8. Don’t even think about french fries!  Even worse than saturated fats are the dreaded trans fats. Fast food french fries are as bad as it gets when it comes to trans fats.  Lisa Dorfman (quoted above) puts it bluntly, “You might as well take a gun and shoot yourself.”
9. Don’t use Tropical oils (Palm kernel and coconut oils ) when you cook at home, and try to avoid them when you eat out.  Use heart-healthy oils like olive, canola and safflower instead.
10. Read Labels!  Whether they’re soup labels or labels on baked goods - you’ll be surprised at the number of places trans and saturated fats turn up.  Take the time to educate yourself.  It’s THAT important.

Joi

It’s all about the Almonds! (Click for great recipes, including one for Roasted Sweet Garlic and Almond Soup - Garlic’s a super food, itself.)

~ Did you know there is as much calcium in an ounce of almonds as in quarter cup of milk?  I just read that.  On the site.  Thought you’d want to know.  Moving on. I’ve become an almond stalker.

“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” - George Bernard Shaw

“We don’t grow older, we grow riper” - Pablo Picasso

“Old age is not a disease - it is strength and survivorship, triumph over all kinds of vicissitudes and disappointments, trials and illnesses.” - Maggie Kuhn

“Age merely shows what children we remain.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“The minute a man ceases to grow, no matter what his years, that minute he begins to be old.”  - William James

“You don’t stop dancing from growing old, you grow old from stopping to dance.”

“Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young.” - Henry Ford

This is the last in the series of Living to Be 100 posts.  I’m ending with a great article on Prevention.com.  It’s called “Cancer Proof Your Life” and will be one of the most important articles you’ve ever read.  It’s a compilation of “30 tips, tricks and tactics to help keep you out of the Big C’s reach.”  Sound good?  Sounds good.  Don’t just read over the list, either….print the article out.  As a matter of fact, print a copy for each of the people you love.  After all, if you’re shooting for 100, you want them to live the marathon with you!

The 30 tips will count for #71 - #101 on our list - giving us a bonus of 1.

The main tip, however, for living longer and healthier is this:  Start making healthy changes TODAY and keep it up on all of your TOMORROWS.  Doing so will make those TOMORROWS healthier and happier….and will give you more of them! 

That’s something we can all live with.

Joi

Geez, more eating dos and don’ts (Some of these cause me great consternation, like #62, for example!):
61.  Eat Mediterranean. Greek and American research have found that eating a Mediterranean diet can cut premature deaths by up to 25 percent.
What, exactly, is a Mediterranean diet?  Simple - lots of fruit, vegetables, nuts, beans, and olive oil.
62. Take it easy on grilling.  I don’t know about you, but I’ve always associated “grilled food” with “healthy food.”  I read recently, however, that there IS a risk in grilling out too often - especially if you like your meat well-done.
Cooking at high temperatures creates chemicals that may increase your risk of cancer.  The American Cancer Society reports that it’s safe to grill occasionally - just don’t overdo it.  3-4 times a week?  That’d fall into the overdoing it category.
63.  Go easy on the drinks.  Did you know that too much wine - or any alcoholic beverage - increases the odds of damaging your liver and kidneys as well as increasing your risk of oral cancer?
64.  Up your antioxidant intake.  Drink tea instead of soda, and choose liberally from fruits and vegetables that are loaded with antioxidants. 

Black and Green Teas have powerhouse antioxidants that protect against heart disease and some cancers.

65.  Drink Apple Juice.  Doing so may prevent age-related memory loss.

66.  Switch to Whole Grains.  Just one daily serving helps lower your risk of hear disease.

67.  Eat more Oily Fish.  Doing so has been proven to alleviate arthritis, protect against diabetes, and boost brain health.  It’s also rich in omega-3 fatty acids which contribute to the health of your heart and arteries.  Check THIS out if you aren’t sure what fish are “oily fish” and what ones aren’t.  I had no freakin’ idea, so I was really glad to find this chart.

68.  Eat Miso Soup.  Have you ever done so?  I know I haven’t, but experts at Japan’s National Cancer Center found that having it regularly lowers death rates from cancer, heart disease and liver disease.

69. Cozy up to Gazpacho as well.  A study of volunteers showed that those who ate two bowls of Gazpacho every day for two weeks had higher levels of vitamin C and lower levels of stress chemicals.

70.  Java Junkies ReJoice!  I may have to cut back on grilling, I may need to replace more of my Diet Dr. Peppers with green tea, I may need to get familiar with Miso Soup, and I need to find out what in the heck Gazpacho even is - - - - but #70 I’m all over.

Just one cup of coffee a day seems to help protect against liver cancer.

I think I’ll end on a good note….

The crazy cool mug at the top is from Boca Java - who’s link happens to be to the left.

Have an impossibly great weekend!

Joi

By the way, the information I’m gathering for this “100 Ways..” posts come from Prevention.com, Prevention the Magazine and another of my favorite magazines “quick & simple.”