December 2006

We’re just hours away from slamming the door on 2006.  Personally, I’m all for it.  Aside from a few great highs (Like my beloved St. Louis Cardinals winning the World Series), 2006 was pretty nasty and I’ll be glad to see 2007 butt it out of the way.

New Year’s Day is a pretty special holiday. There’s a feeling of hope in the air - hope of better days and hope of dreams coming true.  On New Year’s Day, everything seems possible - all we have to do is RESOLVE to make everything the way we envision it, right?  Okay, maybe not quite right.

Resolutions, alone, don’t make our dreams come true. No more than making a wish before blowing out candles makes the wish come true. In order to be anything beyond pretty words written on a paper, resolutions have to be followed up with:

1. A strong belief in ourselves
2. Conviction and hard-headed determination.
3. A willingness to give up certain things and to make compromises
4. Hard work
5. More hard work

Whether our resolution is to read more books (yes!), get in better shape (Lord, yes!), save more money (sorry, hubby, but no), or stop a particular habit - the approach has to be the same.  We have to believe we can make it happen, we have to be willing to give up certain things that we probably don’t want to (fried mozarella sticks come to mind), and we have to work hard every single day of the year….and that means beyond January 14th!

If, like me, you have a list of things you want to work on - good for you! To be content with oneself invites complacency and stifles growth.  (Stagnant ponds are never as beautiful as flowing rivers!)  I hope you’ll keep chasing after your goals and dreams and never slow down. 

Don’t give up and don’t look back.   Who you were doesn’t matter.  What you did matters even less.  All that counts is who you are, what you’re doing, where you’re going, and who you’ll be. 

Yesterday wants us to close the door on it and walk away.  With the attitude 2006 had with me, I’m more than willing to oblige!

Have a very safe and very happy New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. 

Joi

Darn. Double dirty darn. Nah, that doesn’t cut it.  I’ll tell you what, if someone will write down every foul, horrible curse word in existence….and I give  you the liberty to even make some up….then have it notorized and faxed to me, I’ll sign it.

With a flourish.

My internet’s homepage just lost a great deal of interest for me, and my mornings have been robbed of a sure-fire 7:00 am smile.  My much-loved Foxtrot, one of the funniest, most brilliant comics ever (it’s like the Peanuts of this generation), will now only run on Sunday’s. 

Seems the creative genius behind Jason and the rest, Bill Amend, wants to experience more from life.  He wants to try new things, have new experiences, have more time with his family…..I don’t know, something about living life outside of working all the time.

But, Bill, how will I make it through the day without Jason, Peter, Paige, mom, dad, lizards, and the fun they bring with them?! I’m as addicted to this family as I am to coffee.  Come on, handcuff yourself to your drawing table and keep on keeping on…my mornings demand it!

…oh, alright.  Have it your way - have your…have your life.  Have your family…have your fun.  I still have Garfield.  And..and… I still have the Dilbert’s that make sense to me.  (The height of humiliation is having to carry a newspaper through the house, folded open to the comics and ask someone, “What does this mean…” followed a few minutes later by, “Oh I get it now.  Yeah, that’s pretty funny!”)

In all seriousness, I’m impressed with Bill Amend’s decision.  You gotta love someone who wants to stop embracing life with just one arm and go after it with both.  He’ll get a lot more out of it that way.  Embracing with just one arm is like kissing with just one lip.

Hopefully, the incredibly popular Foxtrot will continue in the way Peanuts has been.  Ironic, isn’t it - one’s in reruns because the creator died and one will be in reruns because the creator’s living.  

I raise my coffee cup to you Bill Amend.  You may not know it, but coffee cups and I have spent 19 years with you and you’ve given me millions of smiles. I’m smiling this morning, too, because I think you’re going to wear this living out loud thing beautifully. And, at least we’ll have Sunday’s together.  I didn’t even get that from Opus and Bill the Cat.

Like they say, “Life’s for the living.”  And like I say, “Never live just above a whisper - live out loud or stay in bed.”  Okay, I’ve never said that before today…but, yeah, you get the idea.

Joi

 I just read something interestingly disturbing and thought I’d pass it along. Did you know that restaurants that allow smoking can have up to six times the air pollution of a busy freeway.  Six times the air pollution of a busy freeway. 

Not too appetizing, is it? But it gets worse.

Nonsmoking areas can actually be more toxic than smoking sections.  Why?  Because of faulty ventilation systmes that emit dirty air into nonsmoking areas.

In an Arizona eatery, researchers found that the level of one type of cancer-causing particle in the air of the nonsmoking dining room was 48 percent higher than at the cigarette-friendly bar.

Secondhand smoke can raise the risk of heart disease and lung cancer by up to 30 percent. 

Makes you think.  And makes you want to get it to go or make it at home.

Joi

“Everything works out in the end.  If it doesn’t, it’s not the end.”  - Unknown

“I now know that I learn by solving problems as they arise.  Rarely do we learn significant lessons, or improve, any other way.”  - Bob Parsons 

***If you click right about HERE, you’ll find a post by Bob Parsons which includes his own 16 Rules for Success.  They’re really, really special - and are just begging to be printed out and memorized.  However, the website offers an even better solution.  They’ve taken the Rules and created a great looking poster - you can purchase it right from the site.

Pretty timely, as you know what’s just around the corner. R-e-s-o-l-u-t-i-o-n-s.  But I’m not going there, yet, I’m still way too full and much too tired to take on something like self improvement.  With all the room I have for improvement, I’ll need all my powers of concentration going top speed rather than cruising on cruise control!

Hope your Christmas was all you wanted it to be and more,

Joi

Joi

You know, if we really cut to the heart of the matter - all self help books and blogs have one thing in common:  They’re trying to help others get the most out of life by getting the most out of themselves.  The only real way to do either is to begin looking inwardly more often.  By that, I don’t mean thinking selfishly, of course - don’t re-program your mind to start chanting, “Me, me, me, me…”  Looking inwardly is more about accountability.  You know, looking in the mirror - as tough as it sometimes can be.

One of the best books ever written on….well…on anything is How to Win Friends and Influence People.  Don’t let the title or the age of the book fool you, this is required reading for life.  If you want to graduate to the next level, that is.

Author Dale Carnegie had a very brilliant mind and we could do ours a great service by spending more time with his.

If you’ve never read “How to Win Friends and Influence People” yet, make it a New Year’s Resolution to do so. Put it at the top of the list - unless, of course, you’re battling something that could kill you, like smoking, then put the book second.  If you have read it, you can put it on your list a little lower - somewhere between drink more water and get more exercise. 

One of the main principles of this great book is the admonition for us to become friendlier people.  I’m sure we all read that sentence and think, “I’m already a friendly person.  I speak to everyone that speaks to me, I let elderly people in front of me in line, I say please and thank you….”  And while those are all perfectly commendable, there’s a difference between being a polite person and a friendly person.

Below are ten areas the book advises us to look at.  As you read them, you’ll begin to see a picture forming - you, as you really are.  You’ll realize one of two things, “Whew, I’ve got friendliness covered, I can move on to the next lesson…” or “Oh. My. God. I’m a grouch.  No wonder things I want aren’t coming my way.”  If the latter’s the case, Oscar, just start working on it!

 1.  Don’t criticize or condemn people.  Some adults act like they skipped kindergarten - they call names, make fun of people, mock, etc.  Then they wonder why people don’t give them the respect they believe they so richly deserve! 

 2.  Give honest, sincere appreciation.  If the only time you open your mouth is to complain, critique, or demand something - you’d be better off keeping your lips zipped.

 3.  Arouse enthusiasm in the other person.

 4.  Become genuinely interested in other people, what THEY want and need - not just what YOU want or need from them.

 5.  Smile!

 6.  Remember that a person’s name is to that person one of the important sounds in any language.  Use their name when addressing them.

 7.  Don’t complain.  Everyone is fighting his or her own battles in life. Besides, if you complain about every little thing, people will develop the habit of tuning you out.  Then one day, when you have a legitimate biggie….it’ll be too late.  People will have been trained, by then, to only listen with one ear.

 8.  Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.  Don’t make it all about YOU - bring THEM into the picture.

 9.  Be a good listener.  Ask what others need or want.  Then, when they tell you - do your level best to help them.

10.  Make others feel important.  Don’t be a kiss up, for crying out loud….people see kiss up lips coming a mile away. Just develop the habit of sincerely caring about other people and letting them know.

Think about it this way.  If your thoughts this past month were a painting, would you be the only person on the canvas?  If there were others in the picture, would they be serving you or would you be serving them?  Maybe, just maybe, your picture would be a real work of art:  One in which you and others are working together on something to make everyone’s life a better place to call home.

“Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have.” ~ Dale Carnegie

I thought this was pretty admirable.  Petitie and pretty actress Christina Ricci was named the “Worst Dressed Celebrity” by PETA because of a fur coat she wore on a cover of W Magazine.  She didn’t get defensive or simply blow it off, she wrote them a letter of apology:

“After being named on the PETA worst dressed list for wearing fur on the cover of W magazine, I have been deluged with angry and disappointed fans. I never meant to hurt nor anger anyone with my insensitivity. For what it is worth I have received the message loud and clear and will not be wearing fur in the future. I apologize for my offensive actions.”

That just impresses the heck out of me. She refers to her actions as insensitive and offensive, when she did a helluva lot less than most celebrities (and pageant winners) do without so much as an “Oops..”

Good for her!  Eh, these days, having class deserves at least two exclamation marks, so make that Good for her!!

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Have you seen the trailer for the movie, Transformers? AMAZING!  I’m all psyched up, so I can just imagine how worked up my husband will be when he sees it.  Click HERE to check it out.  The good news is it looks like it’ll be an amazing ride.  The bad news is, the ride will have to wait until July.

Have trailers always come out this early or is this a new thing to work up interest? If that’s the case, I think there’ll be long, long lines around theaters in July.

The cast includes Josh Duhamel, Shia LaBeouf, Tyrese Gibson, Anthony Anderson, and Jon Voight.  The official website is http://www.transformersmovie.com/ and it, too, is pretty amazing.

Have an awesome Thursday!

Joi

Boy, Miss USA, Tara Conner is causing a lot of outrage for someone so young, isn’t she? Yes, yes, yes…she messed up BIG TIME.  No… It’s worse than that - she broke the law. Cocaine (which she is said to have tested positive for) is illegal, underage drinking is illegal - so she not only has the morals of a street dog, she’s a law breaker, as well. Personally, I think it should have cost her the crown.

But, before we start asking her to stand still while we all pelt her with gravel, I think we’d be better off if we looked at the bigger picture.  Instead of trying to place a scarlett letter on her sash, maybe we should finally start addressing the problems that she represents.

I don’t think she does represent the typical young woman in America (thank God), and I don’t think she should keep the title that gives her that honor. But I do think she represents a very real problem.

We live in a time when promiscuity, drinking, and even drugs, are all around us.  I positively, absolutely, 100 percent admire any young person who can stand up to peer pressure these days.  My hat’s off to them and if I had the means, I’d buy them all something nice and shiny. 

Remember years ago when everyone laughed at Tipper Gore? Have you heard the lyrics your kids know by heart?  If you have the stomach for it, go to Google, enter a song’s title + lyrics and see the “unbleeped” words. It’s not just sex and drinking anymore, the people your kids look up to, admire, and try to emulate are glorifying drugs as well.  I’m not laughing any more, are you? 

We’ve allowed television, music, magazines, commercials, and books the freedom to say and do whatever they wanted and now the bill has come and we have to pay.

Tara Conner is a representative, of sorts, and a very accurate one.  She simply got caught doing what a large number of young people are also doing.

I’m not trying to make light of anything she did - as a fellow Kentuckian, I’m extremely disappointed. The pride we felt when she was announced as the winner gave way to shame soon enough! It’s made worse by the fact that some are trying to “excuse” her because she’s from a small town in Kentucky. Please! How insulting. “She’s from a small town in Kentucky, New York City was too much for her…” Um, if you’re head’s on straight in Small Town, Ky - it’ll be on straight in Big Town, USA. If your head’s turned in the big city, it wasn’t screwed on very tight to begin with.

When the sanitation department carries our trash off, it doesn’t matter where they take it - it’ll be trash when it gets there because it was trash when it left here.

But, even after sinking as low as humanly possible, it is possible to rise back up. Unfortunately, the way up is always a tougher climb than the way down. It’s as true with life as it is with hills! The potential to stop and the likelihood of sliding back down are constant threats - but if you keep looking upward, your body will feel inclined to carry you there.

I hope with all my heart that she starts moving in the right direction. Uneasy lies the head that wears the crown - especially when everyone wants to knock it off of your head!  Maybe she’ll actually start trying to earn it.

Better late than never.

Two of my daughters (Brittany and Stephany) and I were on our feet all day yesterday.  I don’t think there was a store in a 50 mile radius that we didn’t comb through.  We were Christmas shopping for loved ones and wanted just the right things.  Unfortunately, just the right things take a lot of thought and even more footwork.

Anyway, when we finally drug in, you could see the exhaustion on our faces.  We each looked like a hot bath and warm bed were the only reasonable things left.  But, instead we each (almost automatically) went about our evening routines, rights, and passages.  One signed on to check her e-mail, invite her IMs to spring forth, and to see how many hundreds of visitors her Justin Timberlake website had entertained while she was away.  Another worked on putting her stuff away, then repairing what the cold rain had done to her hair.  Kentucky Rain is a beautiful song, but not such a beautiful experience when it’s this cold.

The third wet rat…that would be this one….automatically went about her evening routine.  Gathering pots, pans, spices, and foodto fix supper as well as a Monday night Football snack.  It struck me as kind of funny that we each went about our routines without even thinking about it.  But that’s the way we fall into habits, whether they’re good ones or whether they’re bad.

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habit (noun) - an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary

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Almost involuntary. Incredibly true, is it not? 

Today, notice how many things you do or say that seem almost involuntary.  These are the Habits that are, to a very real degree, determining the quality of our days and the course of our life.  If neither is what we want them to be, this is the first place we need to look.  After all, if we’re doing certain things almost involuntarily - they have become us and we have become them.  If it’s something you don’t want to “be as one” with anymore, refuse to take it into 2007 with you.

By the same token, if there are things you wish WERE habitiual for you - there’s no time like the present to start.  I’ve written about it before, experts say that it takes 6 weeks to form a new habit or break an old one.  Just think - if we start today, we can be rid of an old one or the proud owner of a new one before Valentine’s Day.

Wouldn’t that be love-ly?!