October 2007

If you’ll indulge me for a few minutes, I’d like very much to put on my Mother Hen apron.  Oh, who the cluck am I kidding, I never take it off.

There have been so many tragic stories lately, seemingly even more than usual.  They’re made all the more tragic because they could have been prevented.  I’m not going into deep details or particulars because, frankly, I’ll drown in tears if I spend too much time alone with the heartache.  But I did want to call your attention to and remind you of a couple of things.

I hope that you’ll not only let it sink into your own psyche, but that’ll you’ll spread the thoughts to everyone you love.  Yes, I’m asking you to put on your own version of an apron…then to spread it over as many people as you can.

In Texas, a 5 year old boy was hit and killed by a train.  He and a few others were playing on the tracks when they saw the train coming.  The others were able to get away, but the little guy’s foot got stuck and he was trapped.  I know there’s only so much we can do to protect our children, but there are certain things that they have to, have to, have to know are NO NOs - NO NOs to the tune of “If you so much as get anywhere near that train track, not only will you not be watching tv, playing video games or getting anywhere near the computer - you’ll be doing everyone in the house’s chores.  Standing, because sitting won’t be an option.”

I just flashed back to a squeaky woman’s voice shreiking on a morning news show years ago about spankings being “violent” and about yelling at kids “infinging on their rights.” Her way of thinking has created a generation of people who don’t want to answer for anything or to anyone.  And I digress.

If you know anyone with children - even if they don’t LIVE near railroad tracks - I hope you’ll encourage them to let their little ones know about the danger.

Another tragedy also involved young people.  When I heard it on the radio, all I could say was “Damn.”  A group of college kids were at a weekend house in North Carolina.  A fire started at night and killed 7 of the young people.  Officials have said that the fire was “accidental” but haven’t released any more information.  Whether it was candles, cigarettes, or something else remains to be seen - but the odds are incredibly high that it was a result of someone not paying close enough attention or exercising enough caution.

Kids aren’t the only ones who drop the ball when it comes to fire hazards.  Just about all of us, at one time or another, leaves a curling iron plugged in, a candle burning, the iron left on, etc.  Fortunately, most of us are lucky enough to live long enough to feel ridiculously careless and vow to be more cautious in the future.

Vows we should keep.  Remind everyone you know (older, younger…doesn’t matter) that just one tiny lapse in caution can cost you your life.  Will you sound like a “nag?”  No, you’ll sound like someone who cares.  And even if you did sound like a nag, if it saved a life, do you really care?!  An older woman who worked at my daughters’ pre-school when they were 3 and 4 once told another woman and I that she thought we were overprotective (we made our children wear seatbelts and kept them home when they had fevers = we were overprotective).  I told her “I can live with that.”  The other lady said, “Better than being underprotective,” then we went to help our daughters on with their coats, scarves, and gloves as we walked them to their seatbelts, before driving them home to their soup and hot chocolate. I guess we all handle our treasures differently.

When senseless tragedies hit the news, take the opportunity to talk about them to the people you treasure. There isn’t a better act of love than that. 

I try hard to keep all of us up to date on the foods we should be eating more of, the foods we should be eating less of, and the foods we should touch about as often as I touch USA Today’s Money section - as in never (Unless, of course, it’s lying on top of the Entertainment/Life section, in which case I have to touch it long enough to fling it.  And yes, I do have my fluffy little priorities in order.)

The thing that’s kind of tricky about nutritional news is that it’s forever changing.  New studies seem to come out every week trumpeting a new super food.  But there are certain foods that make the cut again and again.  They’re like the Patriots - others may occasionally steal the spotlight, and others may certainly be flashier but they’re winners and you can bet on them just about every time.

Below is a list of just such winners, along with what wonders they can work for you.  They’re “Super Foods” that culinary expert Sara Moulton and BabyBoomers.com recommend for those who are interested in achieving the best health possible - should be all of us, right?

Moulton sums it up by saying, “The most basic health fact one can remember about any food is, the darker or richer the color, the better it is for you.  In addition, less processed foods are always better than those that are highly processed.”

THE SUPER FOODS

Blueberries

One of the best-tasting super foods, blueberries provide excellent benefits for the brain.  One cup a day (fresh or frozen) lessens the effects of both Alzheimer’s disease and damage from a stroke.  If they provide that much in the way of help for existing problems, you have to figure they’ll go a long way in preventing problems.  Ways to sneak blueberries into your diet:

• Toss them in your corn flakes.  The money you save from buying a cheaper cereal will off set the cost of the blueberries.  Throw in another super food, like walnuts, and you’ve dealt a one-two punch.
• Put some granola into a bowl, spoon some vanilla-flavored yogurt on top, then add your blueberries.  It’s so delicious you’ll think of it as dessert. If you’re trying to get the young people in your life to eat a healthier diet, this will do the trick.  If they’re persnikety, forget to tell them that it’s yogurt…until they fall in love with it.
• A healthier alternative to the corn flake suggestion is to toss them into your oatmeal.  Remember, any time you can combine two super foods at one sitting is pure brilliance.

Tomatoes

It seems that most of the time, experts tell us that to get the most from a food, we need to eat it as raw as possible.  Tomatoes, however, are a big exception.  To get the most out of tomatoes cancer-fighting antioxidant lycopene, cooked tomatoes are best. Canned tomatoes, ketchup, tomato paste and tomato sauce are all good sources of lycopene.  Fortunately, unlike some super foods, these are all inexpensive and easy to work with.  Tomato sauce, paste, and canned tomatoes work wth any kind of pasta you can imagine.  One of my favorite things to do with canned tomatoes is to combine them with okra.  Fast, easy, healthy, and so delicious! 

Spaghetti squash is also good with drained canned tomatoes.  Sprinkle a little oregano, thyme, basil, or rosemary on top and you’re set. 

Whole Grains

Whole grains aren’t just a dieter’s salvation, they’re very important to our health.  They provide phytonutrients that help reduce the risk of heart disease, stroke, and type 2 diabetes. Good sources of whole grains are:

• Barley
• Brown rice
• Buckwheat
• Bulgur (cracked wheat)
• Millet
• Oatmeal
• Popcorn
• Whole-wheat bread, pasta or crackers
• Wild rice

Walnuts

The Omega-3 fats in walnuts is a good fat.  How good?  Omega3 fatty acids reduce the risk of heart disease AND hypertension.  All nuts, in fact, provide healthy benefits and should be included in our daily diet.  A few ways to work them into our days:

• Throw them into/onto cereal, oatmeal, yogurt, tossed salads, chicken salad, steamed green beans (slivered almonds)
• Toast them in a 360 degree oven for 10 minutes and eat them as a snack.  Toasted nuts are also freaking amazing when incorporated into baked goodies or thrown into popcorn (a yes-yes from the whole grain family) 

Wild Salmon

Salmon is another great source of omega-3 fatty acids.  It heps reduce blood pressure, lower cholesterol, and prevent heart disease.  When fresh, wild salmon isn’t in season, canned salmon is an excellent choice (canned salmon is almost always wild).  I make really mean salmon cakes (using crackers instead of bread crumbs gives them more confidence).  The husband likes putting freshly-squeezed lemon juice on them, and since he has fallen so in love with horseradish (another super food, actually!), I have a feeling he’ll slather a little layer on the next time I serve salmon cakes - or as we call them in Kentucky, Salmon Patties.

Cabbage

What does cabbage have to offer?  It’s full of sulphoraphane glucosinolate, an antioxidant that helps prevent cancer, more specifically breast cancer.  Cabbage is pretty versatile and can be worked into a lot of dishes:

• Shredded and used in coleslaw is the most obvious way of serving cabbage.  Experiment with different coleslaw recipes until you find one you love.  Personally, I prefer the recipes that call for apple cider vinegar and sugar instead of the old standby mayo.
• Shredded and added to vegetable or vegetable beef soup is another way of working it into your day.
• Asian dishes are

Beans

Beans (canned or dried) are an excellent source of fiber, antioxidants, and protein.  They can reduce your cholesterol and even slow the sugar level in diabetics, preventing the level from spiking too quickly after meals.

Yogurt

Did you know that yogurt is actually a better source of protein and calcium than milk?  Caught me off guard, too.  You have to make sure that the yogurt contains live and active cultures, including probiotics that help boost the immune system in defending against disease and illness.  A few creative ideas for yogurt:

• I’ve all ready named my favorite way to eat yogurt - with fruit and granola. You can also stir chocolate chips into yogurt, if you’re feeling kind of decadent.
• Make a smoothie with strawberries, blackberries, blueberries or raspberries. Yum.
• Use yogurt as a base for dip.  Add a little dill (or a lot of dill, for that matter, it’s your dip after all), and maybe some garlic.

Dark Chocolate

Dark chocolate not only owns my heart, it is rich in antioxidants.  It lowers bad cholesterol, raises good cholesterol and is even thought to have a positive mood altering effect.  I can attest to that last claim.  Sometimes if my day has been unkind, I head for the candy dish and unwrap a smile or two.

Okay, okay - sometimes I unwrap a few when all’s well, too.  In fact….

 Do the thing you fear to do and keep on doing it… that is the quickest and surest way ever yet discovered to conquer fear. - Dale Carnegie Quote

Courage is not the absence of fear; rather it is the ability to take action in the face of fear. - Nancy Anderson

You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, “I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.” you must do the thing that you think you cannot do. - Eleanor Roosevelt Quote
The difference between a hero and a coward is one step sideways. - Gene Hackman (!!!)

Real courage is when you know you’re licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what. - Harper Lee,  To Kill a Mockingbird

Most of us have far more courage than we ever dreamed possible. -  Dale Carnegie

More Quotes about Courage!

Make that Good Ol’ Horseradish Sense.

My husband and our youngest daughter love this: New research published in the Journal of Agriculture and Food Chemistry has found that Horeseradish contains 10 times more cancer-fighting nutrients than broccoli!  Michael and Stephany, who absolutley love the stuff, have plenty to crow about.  Now when they’re slathering it on their chicken, steak, seafood, crackers, etc. - the rest of us will have to curb our looks of disgust and insults.  After all, they’re actually doing something that’s healthy.  Kind of gross (to our other daughtes and myself, anyway) - but healthy.

Although the title calls out Nitpickers, Soupusses, and Crybabies, we’ll actually be looking at things we can do to get along with everyone better…not just this celebrated group. 

After all, we can wear name brand labels, have manners Dale Carnegie would be proud of, and be so intelligent the CIA has a file on us - but if we can’t get along with others, we’d be better off staying in bed. With the covers over our head.

The first thing we all have to keep in mind is this:  We’re all different.  No two people look at the world in quite the same way.  Everyone has their own personal life experiences that have made them the way they are.  Just because we want another person to behave or react the way we think they should doesn’t mean they will…or that they’re even capable of it.  The sooner we realize that, the sooner more peace will come pouring into our life.  Blankets of it.

When my girls were little, I’d often tell them that you can’t change others, you can only change yourself and how you react to them.  If you know a bully, chances are you’ll never change him/her.  Their own life story has been written in a way that has developed their “character” into a bully.  You can’t rewrite someone else’s story! 

You can, however, perfect your own.  Which is why I’ve always taught my daughters to spend the majority of their energy taking care of their own actions and reactions. 

Below are suggestions for dealing with people who, seemingly, go out of their way to be contrary:

1. When dealing with a complainer, let them complain.  People handle situations differently - and there are those that simply like to complain. They enjoy it! Trying to change them is presupposing that they aren’t happy.  Complaining may be their way of letting off steam - and unless you’re under the exact same pressure cooker, you can’t honestly say their way is the right or wrong way for them. More times than not, we want a complainer to quit complaining so we don’t have to listen to them - but sometimes, the best thing to do is to just listen to them.  It’s not letting them win, and it’s certainly not being weak, it’s being strong enough to allow an unpleasant situation to pass without making it worse.  That’s good old-fashioned common sense that’s anything but common anymore.
2. If someone is argumentative, listen to their argument.  They may be going about it entirely in the wrong way, they may be using inflammatory words, they may even be flailing their arms, yelling, turning red and making a complete ass of themself!  But, listen to the words amongst the fury and see if they carry any weight.  If they do, say so quickly.  Many, many times a person will get to the point of boiling because no one pulled them off the stove when they began to simmer.  Again, it’s not about letting them win - it’s about making a bad situation better.  If you take a bad situation and turn it into a good one for everyone involved, guess what - you aren’t the weak one, you’re the strong one.
3. Don’t ever sink to someone else’s level.  This one’s tough, right?!  When dealing with a really difficult, contrary person, human nature makes us want to respond to them in a like manner.  But doesn’t that make us just like the person who’s actions we despise the most?  Why would we want to look like, sound like, or be like them?  Our goal should be to look like, sound like, and be like the complete opposite of them.  If you know someone who is “sour,” don’t let their sourness rub off on you - stay sweet.
4. Never, Ever use sarcasm.  It’s just ugly.  I honestly can think of few things that are uglier and more unattractive than a sarcastic tongue.  Make a vow to never let your tongue become a sarcastic one.  If someone has done something you don’t like or don’t understand, just say so like an adult.  When we act like adults, a funny thing happens - we’re treated like adults.
5. If someone is a Nitpicker, again, let her pick!  In the book, “How to Get Along with Difficult People,” the author (William J. Diehm) had the following to say about Nitpickers:

When I practiced marriage counseling, I would often say to a quarreling couple, ‘In a prive fight, even the poorest fighter can make an occasional point.  You two fight over everything.  Can you not concede the smallest victory to the other person?’  When picky people are right, let them know.  it will make them less persnickety.

A final thing about getting along with others - if you find that you worry too much about what other people are doing, saying, not doing, not saying…it’s entirely possible that you aren’t spending enough time with the one person that matters most: You.  Sometimes we get so caught up trying to direct the show around us that we forget our own lines!  That’d make as much sense as studying someone else’s script.  If we study theirs, who’ll study ours?

On my Food Blog (”Get Cooking”), I’ve started a series of posts that’ll list the calories and sodium content in the goodies we shove into the old pie hole each day.  Depressing, I know, but we’ve become a nation of fast food addicts.  My thinking is this:  If we’re going to be doing it….and make no mistake about it, we’re going to be doing it…..we’d might as well make the best choices we can.  See, I’m not telling us, “NO!”  I’m telling us, “KNOW!”

So I’ve started the ball rolling with a favorite of mine, as well as Stephany’s (daughter #3).  We could do Arby’s 7 days a week and only wish for a day 8.  Fortunately, there are some great choices at Arby’s and some healthier ones than a lot of other fast food places. 

I’m trying to work my way up to my much, much beloved KFC.  I’m just not sure I want to know all of the Colonel’s secrets - I’m almost certain he’s the most fattening of all, even more so than that clown in yellow.

And yet, having said that, I’m sitting here in a gown and pink fuzzy houseshoes.  My hair is halfway up/halfway down I’m wearing less make-up than an Amish doll.  Yet if the husband called and said, “Meet me at KFC in 10 minutes,” I’d be glamorous and out the door so fast my cats would get whiplash.

To check out the Arby’s post, click HERE.  Then be sure to check back for future postings.